Day 69: Get Mink Eyelashes.

Spot the hidden tarantula.

I wonder if Kim Kardashian ever gets red paint splashed on her by PETA? I mean, even if she doesn’t own a real fur coat, there is enough mink on her lashes to make a small cub! And I’m pretty sure somebody isn’t going around with a lint brush into a den full of minkeys and then re-selling the naturally collected hairs on the black lash market. Although, come to think of it, there probably is a solid business opportunity there.

Anywho… Despite the real possibility that a luxuriously soft animal may have been sacrificed in the name of beauty, today I got mink eyelash extensions.  And I’ll be perfectly honest – I love them! The idea of not having to wear any mascara at all for up to 4 weeks is very appealing.  And before you ask, yes, of course there was a voucher involved.  While I didn’t go full out Kardashian, they are definitely noticeable, and are taking a little getting used to.

Can you spot the difference?

The process involves first of all leaving the house without any eye cream, makeup or mascara on your lids and lashes.  Now, that might sound a touch vain, but as a naturally fair woman in this city, I tend to feel a little naked without furry little spider legs cradling my eyes.  Nevertheless, I managed to drag my bare face over to Ooh La Lash…, which is tucked downstairs inside L’Squared Salon on College Street near Ossington.  Natalie, the chief lash lady and self-professed extension addict, greeted me warmly, and put me immediately at ease on her comfy table with soothing nature songs, answering all my questions as she got down to business.

The session began with an undereye gel treatment, that felt lovely and cooling on my skin.  Next, Natalie secured my lower lashes and upper eyelids into place with medical adhesive tape, which is not particularly sticky, but does a good job of keeping them out of harm’s way.  After combing out my upper lashes with a soft mascara type of brush, she then began to glue individual mink hairs to each and every one of them using tweezers.  While there are silk, synthetic and human (from corpses, may contain formaldehyde) lashes also available, Natalie is not a fan, and prefers to only use the mink hairs in her practice.  My eyes remained shut during the entire application, which was both painless and relaxing.  It took roughly 20 or 30 minutes per eye.  That was it.  Here is an example of the process, for the uber-curious:

Natalie then provided me with some specially formulated mascara (for use primarily on the lower lashes, should I feel so inclined), along with several guidelines to properly care for my new pets, especially during the first 48 hours, which is how long it takes for the glue to fully bond the follicles together.  I’m sure I’ve already broken a few of the rules, as I do, but I’m trying my best to heed them, if only out of respect for the minks that generously contributed their hairs to the process.  Do you think maybe the minkeys donate their extra hairs every spring, kind of like how dogs shed their winter coats, or some women grow their hair and give it to make wigs for cancer patients?  No?  Dangit.  Well, here’s my before and after photos to distract you – sorry about the messy bangs… haircut’s coming tomorrow:

 

A few other tidbits about eyelash extensions that I didn’t know before today is that all eye makeup and cleansers with mineral oil should be avoided, as it loosens the glue, and is in fact what is used to take them off.  You do not need to have them professionally removed; they will just fall out along with your own lashes in about 45-60 days.  Ah, the circle of life.  You should further not sleep on your face or even your side, as the lashes may rub against the pillow, and this particular type of friction in bed is apparently bad.  Here’s another set of diversion photos, where I appear much more awake and alert than I feel:

 

Finally, a ‘filler’ maintenance session is recommended 2-3 weeks after getting a full set applied, to top them up, so to speak, which is priced at a considerable discount.  Some clients are so paranoid about caring for their lashes that they even shower with goggles on to avoid getting them wet.  Tanning beds and saunas should similarly be avoided, due to the steam, which can also contribute to them falling out prematurely.  Now, if I can just get through the next 48 hours without rubbing my eyes with either my fist or a pillow, I will proclaim this beauty adventure to be a smashing success – stay tuned!  Wink, wink (can’t help it, so much fun now!).

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Day 68: Read a Book Without Putting It Down.

I’ve always had a thing for expressions that people use which are not to be taken literally.  One of my faves is when somebody tells me about a book that they were reading which was so good, that they couldn’t put it down until they finished it.  I mean, I find it hard to believe that most people would not put a book that they were reading down, if only momentarily, say to flush.

Today, though, I did read an entire book literally without it leaving my hand, and found the experience to be quite satisfying.  Having a bladder the size of a walnut, I wisely chose a short volume with relatively few words for this experiment: “One Hundred Great Books in Haiku“, written by former attorney and self-proclaimed haiku humorist, David Bader.  I cannot quite recall when or where I bought it, but its format lends it to be terrific bathroom reading material.

If you are unfamiliar with Haiku, it is a clever form of Japanese poetry that typically consists of three lines, with the English equivalent of 5, then 7, then 5 syllables each. Its essence must be cutting, and usually involves contrasting images.  It traditionally also includes some kind of seasonal reference.  Most importantly, haiku tries to convey, rather than tell, an idea to the reader in as few words as possible.  In a word, genius!

Here are some of my personal favourites from the book – may you feel inspired to write one of your own – enjoy!

  • Brave New World – Aldous Huxley: Euphoric drugs, sex, | cloning, the past forgotten. | So what else is new?
  • Don Quixote – Miguel de Cervantes: Dusk – the windmills turn. | Is the Don mad, or are we? | No, it’s him all right.
  • Gulliver’s Travels – Jonathan Swift: Thus I was first great, | then small, and much vexed to learn | that size does matter.
  • Hamlet – William Shakespeare: ‘His mother wed his | dead murdered father’s brother!’ | Next Jerry Springer.
  • Frankenstein – Mary Shelley: A mad scientist | creates a ghastly Monster | who just wants a hug.
  • Kama Sutra – Vatsayana: Advice for those in | a difficult position. | First, be flexible.
  • Lady Chatterley’s Lover – D.H. Lawrence: On the grounds, fresh game. | On the new gamekeeper, fresh | Lady Chatterley.
  • Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov: Lecherous linguist – | he lays low and is laid low | after laying Lo.
  • Oedipus Rex – Sophocles:  Chorus: Poor bastard. | Oedipus: This is awful! | Blind Seer: Told you so.
  • Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen: Single white lass seeks | landed gent for marriage, whist. | No parsons, thank you.
  • Robinson Crusoe – Daniel Defoe: Alone for twelve years, | then a footprint in the sand. | Thank God!  A servant!
  • The Canterbury Tales – Geoffrey Chaucer: Pilgrimmes on spryng braecke – | roadde trippe! Whoe farrtted? Yiuw didde. | Noe, naught meae. Yaes, yiuw.
  • The Confessions – St. Augustine: This is just to say | I screwed around. Forgive me. | I enjoyed it so.
  • The Odyssey – Homer: Aegean forecast – | storms, chance of one-eyed giants, | delays expected.
  • Waiting for Godot – Samuel Beckett:  Act I. ‘It’s hopeless. | My boots don’t fit. Where is God?’ | Act II. The same thing.

Who knew poetry could be so much fun on a Monday?  And with that, I give you one final haiku, namely my own, as a review of this book.  Hope you like it!

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Day 67: Glass Blowing Workshop.

This is not a blow dart gun.

I have always been fascinated by glass, most likely because it is shiny and can reflect a beautiful array of colours.  The first time I saw glass blowing, though, it truly blew my mind!  How can something so hard to the touch be completely malleable like icing when it is heated up?  Incredible!  Similar to candle-making, I found myself drawn once again to a craft that has remained virtually unchanged for centuries.

So when I stumbled upon a weekend workshop for glass blowing at the Harbourfront Centre, I became downright giddy.  This was something that I had always wanted to try.  I was lucky enough to secure one of only four spots available, as the process does come with a certain amount of danger requiring virtually constant supervision.  Call it a bonus.

The course began on Friday evening.  Clayton Haigh, one of the glass studio’s artists-in-residence, was our instructor.  He went over the basic process and terminology with us, as well as the all-important safety reminders, in his very laid-back and casual style.  When you are working with molten glass and furnaces that are heated to 2050F, keeping your cool is definitely a good philosophy to practice.

Our very own moon rocks beat paper, every time.

Next, he mesmerized us with a demo that ultimately resulted in an intricate and colourful paperweight.  It was enchanting.  We then worked in pairs to try and replicate the feat with varying degrees of success.  I’ll let you guess which one of the rocks was mine.

The basic process of glass blowing entails heating up the end of a hollow rod that resembles a pool cue.  This is used to gather molten glass from the large brick-lined furnace, which takes about a week to shut down and cool off, so it is left on most of the year.

Fire in the hole!

The stick is spun constantly between the blower’s fingers to try and keep the glass centred and balanced.  It is routinely fired in the glory hole (I kid you not, that is what these blazing hot ovens are called) to maintain its temperature and soft texture so that it does not cool too quickly and crack. The glass is smoothed to an elongated shape on the pole using a combination of a soaking wet wooden block, wet folded newspaper, and a stainless steel marber table.  Other medieval looking tools and wooden paddles are also incorporated into the process at various points along the way.

Smoothing a very hot potato.

The all important blowing is done to expand the glass with an air bubble once the desired shape has been reached.  A smooth and even stubby is then cooled slightly to be used as the base for another gather of molten glass.  The smoothing, blowing and gathering steps, interspersed with constant firing in the glory hole, are repeated until sufficient glass is on the constantly rotating rod to make the final product.

The air bubble in the glass is periodically reinforced by tapering the end of the glass into a rounded diamond-shaped tip. Once the desired size and form are more or less reached, the glass is then transferred to a solid punt stick, and, of course, constantly fired in the glory hole.

If colour is to be added to the piece, it can either be dipped in bits of coloured sand, or else a separate punt stick with a relatively small gather of glass is prepared and rolled in the sand, fired, and then dripped and dragged onto the main object with tweezers and other tools to reach the desired effect.

Glass blowing requires an incredible amount of concentration and patience.  Watching Clayton work inspires a great deal of respect for the craft, and it is clear to see that every single project for him is truly a labour of love.

Getting to the punt of the transfer.

Needless to say, the process and heat involved in working in such close proximity to the furnaces was exhausting and about as dehydrating as hot yoga.

I was encouraged to find that the cut-out socks covering my arms and bottom half of my hands helped the furnaces to seem much less intimidating on the second day, and the cracking of exploding glass from the used sticks in the buckets no longer had me jumping out of my skin by late afternoon.

I’m not a little teapot, despite my handle and spout.

Saturday’s lesson consisted of making hollow creations, which emphasized the importance of blowing the air bubble uniformly.  This resulted in creating a drinking glass for me.  Sunday generated a small pitcher with a blue heart on it, followed by a clear plate, which was super fun to twirl.  Between our inexperience and doubt in this rather fluid process, not to mention the occasional yet predictable catastrophe (if I never gather again, it will be too soon), we kept Clayton hopping busy.

Sunday’s masterpieces chillaxing in the oven.

We’re not quite done, though, as the pieces require a considerable amount of time to cool down, which is done very gradually in computer-controlled ovens.  We still need to return for one more evening to grind and polish them before our masterpieces will truly reveal themselves.

I am frankly astonished that I managed to emerge from the weekend miraculously unscathed, although I cannot say the same for my dear partner, who suffered a few burns on her fingers and arm.  Hopefully, she will have significantly healed by the time we reunite to marvel at each other’s finished works of art later on this week.  All in all, I have to say that glass blowing easily exceeded my expectations, being both more difficult and thus more rewarding than I thought.

P.S. Clayton from here on in shall simply be known as The Fixer.  Feel free to stop by and call him that in the open air studio at Harbourfront, where visitors are always encouraged.

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Day 66: Street Food Block Party.

The Gorilla grilled cheese queue.

Oh what a night…  The Street Food Block Party hosted around 3,000 hungry and thirsty peeps under the pavilion at the Evergreen Brick Works.  The Cinco de Mayo-themed event built up quite a stir the week leading up to the event, with teasers about who the final list of vendors would be, and what dishes they would be conjuring up.  I think the end result can best be summed up in two words:  Sweet jayzus!

Being a fan of the Toronto Underground Market, I managed to buy tickets to this event as soon as they were released on-line, and was feeling rather smug because it sold out in about an hour.

My kingdom for a morsel!

What I didn’t realize was the fact that 3,000 foodies would all end up targeting the same twenty street food vendors and eleven food truck vendors around the same time, which quickly translated into ridiculous line-ups.  Paying for admission to a venue where we then had to queue to buy individual servings of street food? If you needed proof that I was insane, I think tonight speaks volumes.

But one of the things that I love most about this city and its people is that everyone was reasonably chillaxed about it, no doubt at least in part due to the relatively swift queues for booze tickets to the precious beer and wine tables.  The awesome live band also added nicely to the positive vibe.

All the same, it was clear that we needed a strategy, and fast, to keep from keeling over with nothing but wine in our bellies.  So, we opted to divide and conquer.  Between the three of us, we covered two food truck lines, with one wine runner.  It just seemed to make so much sense at the time.

Food – finally!! Lobster roll so yummy!

The first line came to fruition about three glasses in, and it was the one for lobster roll sandwiches from Buster’s Sea Cove.  I won’t lie, I was so famished and tipsy at this point, that I probably devoured mine in all of about three bites, which also meant that I forgot to take a picture of it.  Thankfully, the internet obliged, and so here is a gorgeous photo of it from another blog.  In a word?  YUM!

Next, we had a crucial decision to make:  which grilled cheese sandwich to try from Gorilla Cheese?  Oh, the agony!  Nothing like standing in line for over an hour to get you questioning your gut.  I finally settled on the sarducci, while my companions both decided to stick with the o.g. (original gorilla).  We were not disappointed.  Ooey, gooey, yet crunchy toasted deliciousness.  A momentary glimpse of nirvana, which we washed down with some rather tasty red wine.

Max 3 per person?  Challenge accepted.

Now that the room was spinning a little more slowly, we were able to peruse what the rest of the vendors had on offer.  It was with mixed emotions that we discovered el Gastronomo Vagabundo had sold out of its fish tacos, as the line was still far from short.  We heard praise from other guests for exotic creations such as beef bacon doughnuts, margarita doughnuts, and cakes in a jar from Sullivan & Bleeker.  When I discovered there was no line at Portobello Burger, I snuck in a quick mushroom taco while one of my companions waited in line for our final bite of the evening, a cinnamon churro cupcake from Cupcake Diner.  All, of course, washed down with more delicious grape juice.

So wrong yet oh so right!

This was about the point in the evening where we had the good sense to roll ourselves into a taxi.  The only real taste that I cannot believe I missed, not that I had any place to put it, was the lobster poutine from Rock Lobster Food Co.  I hang my head, and once again covet this photo that should have been mine.

Hope you had an equally marvellous Cinco de Mayo, and remember that, no matter what Mr. Tequila says, he is really only there for a good time, not a long time.  Enjoy the ride!

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Day 65: Picasso Exhibit at AGO.

Has anyone seen my other eye?

Nothing conjures up images of angular, multi-eyed creatures quite the way the name Picasso does.  He is renowned mostly for his cubist paintings, but the current collection of his works on display at the Art Gallery of Ontario (AGO) as part of a world tour also includes several of his intricate sculptures, which surprised me.

The exhibit is entitled Picasso: Masterpieces from the Musee National Picasso, Paris, and consists of more than 150 highlights from the 5000 or so pieces in that museum’s collection, which Picasso kept for himself and his family during his career.  Like most artists of his time, there was no shortage of naked women and brothel scenes, plus a surprising number of men with guitars.  Apparently, this kind of lifestyle is the fountain of youth, as Pablo lived to the ripe old age of 91.  Not too shabby!

Did you know that his full name, in the Spanish tradition, consists of names from both his father and mother, along with a plethora of others sprinkled in for good measure, which I’m thinking may be part of what caused him to be a little, well, special in the first place?  It is Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso.  Picasso was his mom’s last name, and I’d say it was a splendid choice given the options available.

I thoroughly enjoyed browsing through the Picasso exhibit at the AGO, as I got to see many of his works that were completely new to me.  His earlier pieces in the collection actually proved that he could paint and sketch quite accurately and vividly if he wanted to; however, like one of his quotes immortalized on a fridge magnet in the gift shop exclaimed, “It took me four years to paint like Raphael, but a lifetime to paint like a child”.  With quips like that, I bet this guy was solid gold at dinner parties.

Where did I leave my smart phone?

Another of his favourite expressions was printed on a banner that I noticed as I left the mandatory gift shop at the exhibit’s exit: “Youth has no age”, which was curiously juxtaposed above a picture of Pablo as an old man, holding his head as though he has completely lost his marbles.  Awesome.

Highlights for me within the collection included a painting of an older woman with what appears to be a glass eye, done entirely in shades of blue; this was contrasted in the next room with a painting of two young brothers, one riding piggy back, done in shades of pink.

Trying to make heads or tails of the cubist paintings is always good fun, and best done after a few rounds of sangria, in my opinion.  As I alluded to above, I really enjoyed the few sculptures interspersed throughout the exhibit, particularly the ones of ‘musical instruments deconstructed’ (my own title).  A painting of one his muses, Dora Maar, is prominently featured on the cover of the exhibit’s guidebook, and rightly so – it was incredible, and easily my favourite.  Her right hand looks exactly like a Birds of Paradise flower.  Fantastic!

If you are in town, and happen to have a spare hour or two, I would definitely encourage you to check out the collection, and then the rest of the AGO, for that matter, with its own gorgeous galleries and stunning architecture.  This is the Picasso exhibit’s last stop on its world tour, before it heads back to the newly renovated museum in Paris, so if you don’t catch it now, well, you’ll just have to wait and pack your bags to go see it in Paris, and that’s a long way to go for a fresh croissant, baguette, chocolate mousse, gorgeous wine, pain au chocolat, and unbelievably scrumptious cheeses…  On second thought, take me with you!!

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